"They just whooped the hell out of him"

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The marvels contained in this story about a poor bastard who tries to hold up a beauty college in Shreveport are just too many to mention. You know things are about to take a turn for the worse when the reporter writes a sentence like: "That's when Mitchell raised her leg."

From then on, it's all flailing curling irons, blood, and urine. Everything America's Next Top Model should have been.

(Please pay no attention to the blog this is linked to. Just be happy we all share the same basic human need for a good old-fashioned throw-down. -The Editors)

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