Courtney Love's mom.

Oh, Jesus. First this, now this? According to this post, here's what you can expect to find out when you read it, if you read it, which you won't, obviously...

•Courtney started in therapy when she was 6 years old. She was caught reading porn magazines in an adult bookstore at age 9 and was kicked out of every school she attended.

•She took an early stab at alcoholism at 12. One Christmas Eve, she guzzled wine until she vomited, then ran out into a field and started cutting herself.

•After the Christmas incident, young Courtney was sent to a "treatment center" in Oregon for children with severe behavioral problems, but she kept running away and wrecking the place. "We had to tape her legs together after she kicked in a window," Courtney's caseworker said.

•After starting work as a stripper, actress and musician, she "seemed as driven by the impulse to destroy herself as she was to be a star," Carroll writes.

Wait...did he say "tape her legs together"? Idiot. That only works on cats and children under three. No wonder she's a fucking mess.

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