Jazztin Guarswingi.

Look what you can buy with PayPal, bitches! It's safe to say the definitive version of "My Funny Valentine" now exists. Well, at least the definitive horrible West Coast coked-up version. Is that where all the money went? Oh, right. What money.

We are curious about this bit of info on the site: To purchase by phone or for questions, call: 1.888.221.1161. First of all, it really should read "for answers," unless they're giving out questions for later use and, secondly, we have a question: Why? Alas, our fingers are tired from repeatedly flicking off the TV during "Deal or No Deal," so we'll have to pass. If any of you call the number, let us know what happens. Be sure to wake us first. No. Don't.