Thar she blows.

For those of you who loved Lord of the Rings but wished there was more fucking, comes Pirates. It's an all-new swashbuckling porn adventure starring some of the top names in straight porn: Jesse Jane, Janine, Jenaveve Jolie and Carmen Luvana (research indicates that, with the exception of Jesse Jane, those are all their real names). Pirates is described as such:

The most comprehensive and ambitious adult production to date, “PIRATES” is a monumental step towards the eminent merging of the entertainment industries. The entire production was shot and mastered on High Definition and combines over 300 special effects shots. With a professional script, an original music score and true 5.1surround mix offering all of the production values of any Hollywood box office film while still encompassing the erotic feelings and sexual mores of an adult film. With 10 of the most arousing sex scenes in the history of erotic cinema, awe-inspiring Incan magic and grandiose sea battles, "PIRATES" is an action packed, electrifying and swashbuckling sex-tale. Presented on a triple disc set, "PIRATES" sets a new standard in adult production.

Wow. And, get ready for this, the film is presented in a 3-DVD set (yes, that's the same amount of discs as the Critereon Collection's set of Terry Gilliam's Brazil), complete with both Standard DVD and WMV-HD DVD formats of the movie. Additional features include 16x9 Widescreen Format, Bloopers, Casting Video, Photo Gallery, Audio Commentary with the Stars, Behind the Scenes, Visual FX Making of, HD Behind the Scenes, Pirates Short, Bios, Trailers, Chapter Index and No Regional Coding.

While porn bloops are ALWAYS a good time, we have to say we're a wee bit intrigued by the audio commentary, though we fear that after approximately two minutes of listening to Devon describe how amazing the whole experience was you guys, we'd blow our heads off.

Instead, we'll let male star Evan Stone wrap this whole thing up nicely:

“...never before in the history of porn has a movie been made of such grandeur and epic proportions as Joone’s “PIRATES...this is one of the most inspiring movies I have ever done to date.”

No comments: